About Toolbox Quizzes

Simply being aware of some aspects which drive and influence our daily lives is a powerful first step to turning inward with curiosity and care, and which may initiate further ideas/choices.

Quizzes can be conducted with or without a support person, and are useful for individuals to:

  • Build better awareness of how they see themselves.
  • Explore their inner world with curiosity, not judgment.
  • Support emotional wellbeing, creative expression, and personal growth.

And for professionals to:

  • Aid counsellors and psychologists to use these tools at their own discretion.
  • Coach and educate to foster metacognition and reflective learning.
  • Further narrative therapy, dialogical therapy, and cognitive-behavioural approaches.

Quizzes may additionally prove beneficial for user selected third parties (IE in a pre-employment assessment situation, sports coaching, or professional counselling environment).

Terms of Use

The choice to use any tool or topic quiz is made freely by the individual. Quizzes provided have been selected, reviewed and determined by qualified professionals appropriately fit-for-purpose and hail either from legitimate academic studies or research, or examples as currently used by health professionals. Permissions for reproduction and use has been gained by the content owners, where applicable. Supporting material is available in ‘Resources’. Our charter is not in the business of gathering email addresses for promotional campaigns or bombarding users with offers of any kind. The tools provided are FREE to use and designed for individuals in any stage of interest or curiosity. Basic advice relating to quiz results are provided automatically. Follow up on any matter herein is entirely in the hands of the induvial. No future automated correspondence with users is intended, or implied. Users can leave (or de-register, if activating that function) at any time.

Tips & Tricks

  • There is no pressure to get questions ‘right’. 
  • Higher scoring results may not be as desirable as one might usually imagine. 
  • Results are of course dependent on the answers users provide, and to which accuracy and honesty levels are entirely determined by the user.
  • It is helpful to imagine or recall a specific life event or occurrence when considering the questions.
  • Contextually, quiz results will likely vary when related to different life events.    
  • Quizzes can be aborted freely at any stage during completion.

All quizzes are academically and professionally verified. We endeavour to replicate quizzes, tools and material to the closest standard and process guidelines (if provided) or as directed by the study author/s. Quizzes use plain English, with as little subject jargon as possible. We recommend users are as honest as possible.

Options?

  • Quizzes may be undertaken on a one-off basis for which results are immediately available online as a simple screen saver. 
  • Raw data not attributed or attributable to URL or IP addresses may be retained for site management purposes only.

Disclaimer and Acknowledgements

These tools and models may have been adapted with permission-free access in mind and are used here in a non-commercial, transformative way to support self-awareness, creativity, and wellbeing. All original concepts remain the intellectual property of their respective authors and institutions. No data stored or otherwise issued or released to any third party. No financial benefits are attributed or sought from any quiz or toolbox component.

This website abides by NZ and international disclosure and legal requirements; however, we do NOT require the provision of a one-click UNSUBSCRIBE function due to the personal nature and sensitivity surrounding results and any stored information. Registered users may opt-out at any time – requiring a verified password process, being simple, quick and easy, should that function be activated.

Explore The Topics

Our Subconscious

Positivity & Confidence

Internal Dialogue

Resilience

Dwell Time

Affirmations

Self-Image & Ego

Gut Feel & Intuition

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Rejection Has Never Felt Better!

Isn’t it funny how relieved you feel after finally getting up the courage to speak to the hottest boy or girl at a party, and your advance is shut down, leaving you feeling like you’ve just been slapped in the face! It might not seem reasonable when the initial goal was for a Vegemite sandwich in the morning, but many feel precisely this way, while others reflect the opposite on their bummed-out efforts with thoughts such as, ‘I knew this was going to happen, what a waste of time, no one likes me, I’ll just go sit down’. If you...

Isn’t it funny how relieved you feel after finally getting up the courage to speak to the hottest boy or girl at a party, and your advance is shut down leaving you feeling like you’ve just been slapped in the face! It might not seem reasonable when the initial goal was for a Vegemite sandwich in the morning, but many feel precisely this way, while others reflect the opposite on their bummed-out efforts with thoughts such as, ‘I knew this was going to happen, what a waste of time, no one likes me, I’ll just go sit down’. If you are one that would feel relief, you can probably go back to Minecraft, but if you would rather beat yourself up in the other camp, then maybe read on. Why would anyone feel relief? Well, because they have hit rock bottom, and because now the only way is up! These individuals know they don’t have to worry about getting kicked in the teeth again, coz it’s already happened, and they understand that the ‘big risk’ wasn’t the outcome per se, it was the action itself. This represents one of our coping mechanisms and one of our human social survival traits in dealing with failure – rejection of course signalling that failure. Sounds great! Yet this is how things work and has us at a choice ‘Y’ junction of how to deal with that rejection, which is in one of two ways – positive or negative.

Here’s a real-life case study. Massey Hall, Triangle Road, Massey, circa 1979. Friday. 6pm. Winter. Disco had just applied for religious status. Boys and girls lined themselves 15m apart either side of the freezing old wooden hall (no Tevo heaters in those days) sliding awkwardly around on rickety pews that echoed squeaks and scrapes of steel frames on kauri floorboards. All wearing Sunday-best, ready to take the dance floor by storm (also scared as hell) while their parents (obviously recalling their own youthful vulnerability) are just visible through a Pall-Mall haze in the caterer’s kitchen bellowing things like, ‘Oh for God’s sake, just get over there and ask Debbie to dance! What’s the worst thing that could happen!”. Well, Dad, she could see me, that’s what. At least he hadn’t suggested I ask Nicky for a dance – that’s my sister. Of course, it only took one brave soul – partner or not – to squirm out some dance moves to ease the mounting tension. As the dance hall floor fills however, it creates a new predicament; the flowers clawing at the walls, looking increasingly sad and tragic, till it dawns on them it’s a much safer bet in chancing dance humiliation than it is to suffer rejection by isolation! Peer pressure takes over and very soon, 45 seven-year-old Thunderbird puppets are bouncing off the ceiling. The trick now, of course, is how to slow ‘em all down!

These life-hurdles test us all. And good job. But this article isn’t about positivity as such. It’s about how our minds think of ourselves. It’s about our deep mental programming which may well be completely out of our control and glued to our grey matter from an ancient past. It’s becoming evident through tracking our genetic past that some specific genes may have not successfully been pulled through to help us (as best possible) in such situations. Further, there is even research on the theory that having a solid, balanced ego and a healthy self-image are a pre-requisite to gaining value from positivity or achieving desirable outcomes when working with affirmations. And though it might sound a bit pathetic, those challenges at the disco in our case study are part of developing a robust level of resilience. (Mums and dads out there might reflect on whether any helicopter parenting stretches too far into these corners). And these challenges are critical in fact to teach us to feel the pain and pick ourselves up from these episodes. It’s not going to get any easier next time, if we don’t. Further, not getting on top of things reduces a young person’s opportunity to later develop their ‘feather fluffing’, being life’s important display of our worthy traits. One could argue that a lack of confidence in finding a mate is a sign of inferiority enough, and it’s just Mother Nature’s way to support only the strongest in the herd. But no.

This is where the rubber of our social existence meets the physical world’s road. It is true our ego takes knocks, and we suffer setbacks, but here’s the thing – regardless of how we train ourselves, or speak to ourselves, or are encouraged to get back up on that pony, if our ego, self-esteem or self-image are not in order, then there could be little point. This is real. A solid and self-centred, realistic and practical self-image and ego is central to believing what is said to us, and what we say to ourselves. Cutting to the chase – our failures and lessons in life (delicate or serious) are important. Just as when a baby bird is encouraged by its parent to take that first jump from the nest, our efforts and decisions to try (or not) are in the end made all by ourselves. Those ‘leaps of faith’ are part of what makes us humans successful, and not just in the physical world, as our social skills and traits are more responsible for you being here today that you might ever have imagined.

There is a certain humbling reality for those with well-centred egos; they trust in their ability to handle rejection, and further, they then don’t need to put themselves out on the line as much! The irony is screaming from the rafters here. Playing against is known as a trick for ‘loosening up’ for TV, film and stage acting. Its goal is ‘rattle the cage’ and forces something other than what was expected. Here, without warning, an actor will act the exact opposite to that which might be assumed from the script. Amazing things can happen here. It ties also to what philosophers refer as ‘The Law of Reversed Effort’ which basically implies that any high level of urgency and effort toward one specific outcome can be counterproductive. The English author and philosopher Aldous Huxley further states, ‘the harder we try with our conscious will to do something, the less we shall succeed’.

Back at our first party, anyone on the prowl would then need not do anything of the sort in approaching the hottest thing on two legs – but do the opposite of putting themselves out there and expect that the hottest person at the party to do the approaching themselves. Now that’s either one robust ego, or a total dickhead! In either case, the good news is we can work with both. We must. So, why not start with something that terrifies you? Go on, get rejected, and hit rock bottom. (Those in sales should be living and breathing this stuff, and it feels great!)